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Nov 21, 2012 Lighting Design & Controls
Red and Green Light Flirting Signals
The secret of deciphering body language is simple if you know what to look for, writes Katia Loisel-Furey co-author of the two sided book How to get the man you want & How to get the woman you want.
Before our conscious has had time to process the fact that we’re attracted to someone, our physiology has changed and our bodies have already begun to send out a barrage of green light signals that say, ‘you’re hot!’
We stand tall and erect, give ourselves a non-surgical chest lift, pull our stomachs in and tense our muscles. It’s our body’s way of getting us ready for a possible sexual encounter.
But these aren’t the only changes taking place. Bubbling away under the surface like a volcano that’s about to erupt are our micro gestures. These happen within a micro second of first meeting someone and are very hard to spot and even harder to fake.
What to look out for
Watch closely for these micro signals and you’ll be able to decipher what your perspective partner’s body is really telling you. If their shoulders rise quickly, (the shoulder flash), faces open up, eyes widen, pupils dilate, eyebrows raise for a flash, nostrils flare and lips part, they like what they see.
On the other hand, if you notice twitching, facial spasms or weird eye movements then you’ve been given the red light and it’s time to give them a little breathing space.
Scientists at the Indiana University found that men are ill equipped when it comes to understanding female body language. Thankfully women send out up to 5 times as many signals.
So how can you tell if they’re interested or just being friendly?
A flirting signal on it’s own means nothing, so always look for a cluster of 3 – 5 signals simultaneously and remember, if they’re not making eye contact or their body’s not pointed at you, chances are they’re flirting with someone else.
Here are 10 telltale green light signals that tell you that they fancy you.
- Move into your personal space
- Move their head closer to yours or do the ‘whisper and lean’
- Maintain eye contact for two thirds of the time
- Give you the four second face scan
- Keep looking at your mouth
- Touch their mouth or lick their lips
- Flick, fluff or smooth their hair
- Preen or caress themselves
- Unbutton their clothes
- Mirror your actions back to you
If they start flirting in reverse, by moving away, using arm barriers or avoiding eye contact you’ve been given the red light. It’s time to back off slowly and give the object of your desire a bit of room before their barriers go up …permanently.
Here is the original: The New Light